It’s only business. Nothing personal Business owners use that phrase to indicate that there are no hard feelings (typically when the other person is the one experiencing the hard feelings). HA! Talk about low emotional intelligence!

The Truth is…

Business is always personal! Why? Because people are involved and that’s always personal.

Brain science suggests that we tend to think that others are like us. That’s mainly true. We are more alike than different. Yet, we have enough different to cause confusion. I probably haven’t mentioned my ‘Sovereign Nation of Me’ theory yet. I will soon. That phrase is a lame attempt to pacify someone, which is actually disrespecting them and their right to have their feelings. Arggh.

Hence forth- strike that phrase from our vocabulary.

Business is Relative

Business is personal and relative. Power*, likeability, connection all shift like a wave, sometimes towards you, sometimes away from you. Always shifting and emotionally strong entrepreneurs realize that. Take nothing personal isn’t that the 3rd rule of the Four Agreements?

How much your client knows, likes and trusts you might just well depend on the day, how she feels and what you are doing together. Emotionally intelligent entrepreneurs know that and have ways of managing their own emotions. Tell me what you think in the comments.

I’m still noodling this one out. But it got me thinking about how critical emotional intelligence is when you run a business. EQ is, you know, your ability to identify and manage emotions in yourself and others. There’s someone in your life who you call a people person. That person has high EQ.

Boost your Emotional Intelligence

Wouldn’t it be uber helpful to know >/strong> that certain types of clients (read: smart, rich, older) pushed a trigger that caused you to act differently in your business? Or that getting close to success freaks you out so that you unconsciously make mistakes. Or that you give discounts as a way of coping because new=poor experience.

Imagine how your business would grow if you knew your triggers (positive and negative) well enough to make sound decisions?

You can spot those trigger clients and have the skill to appropriately help them get to another resource when your EQ is high. Instead of suffering through and wishing you’d charged more.

Over the next few weeks, let’s explore what emotional intelligence is and why understanding it is critical to your entrepreneurial success.


Dina Lynch Eisenberg, JD, is the CEO of, an outsourcing training/consulting firm for successful lawyers and entrepreneurs based in Oakland, CA.

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