Your success as an entrepreneur rests on the four pillars of emotional intelligence. EQ is your ability to recognize and manage your own emotions and the emotions of others, namely clients. But hey, this stuff works at home, too.

What is EQ?

Let’s dig a little deeper.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to monitor one’s own and others feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and use that information to guide one’s thinking and action. Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer

Salovey and Mayer pioneered the field of research known as emotional intelligence or EQ. Your IQ measures your intelligence, and is a static measurement. Your EQ skills measures your ability to manage emotions, can be taught and naturally increase as you age. How cool is that?

Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence at Work, who popularized emotional intelligence in the 90s, identified four pillars of EQ:

• Self- awareness- Identifying and understanding your emotions and the emotions of others
• Self-management- managing your emotions, adapting to change, taking the initiative
• Social awareness-sensing the feelings of others, reading a social situation and anticipating needs
• Relationship management-managing conflict, fostering collaboration, inspiring others

EQ has been proven to be a key factor in professional and financial success as well as happiness. People with high EQ tend to earn $30k more a year, and that by increasing your EQ by o1 point could raise your income by $1300.

Those Goleman findings caught my attention for a number of good reasons. I know that very few lawyers or entrepreneurs who think about their emotional intelligence when they think of ways to grow their business or ease their burden of overwork.

I love the idea of taking a common business maxim like Know your Client and turning the mirror around to ask: Do you know yourself?

Do you know your own hopes, dreams, interests and fears?
Do you see how your emotions impact your behavior on a day to day basis?
Are you making the connections and taking inspired actions to support a better result?

How does EQ show up in real life for entrepreneurs? Have you ever…

Sent a sales email without the link or pricing?
Given a client a discount because you were new or they insisted?
Added extra services or products to get a better result without telling or charging clients
Gone through a discovery call delivering a ton a value but didn’t ask for the sale
Been frustrated by clients who couldn’t make up their mind
Felt isolated
Resisted change because you don’t like it

If you answered yes to any of these, my friend, your EQ might be a bit low. It’s time to investigate which of your feelings or beliefs is getting in the way and causing you to act against your best interests.

We’re gonna look at each pillar individually because they are fascinating. For now, let me ask you this: Are you understand why you act certain ways and the emotions connected to that action? The comments are all yours…


Dina Lynch Eisenberg, JD, is the CEO of, an outsourcing training/consulting firm for successful lawyers and entrepreneurs based in Oakland, CA.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.